Not a news flash, is it? But the interesting thing is that this seems to fully explain previous experimental results that were taken to show women are uninterested in casual sex. (Thanks, S!)
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I like your headline better!
The linked-to article is very interesting. I am, however, still puzzling over this sentence: “Men thought the proposer — knowing nothing about her — would be a middle-of-the-pack sex partner, while women thought the male proposers would be mediocre.”
This is supposed to say that men’s expectations were significantly higher. Maybe we should suppose that for men the bar for being good is much lower. OR maybe its just that the average woman is better than the average man.
Or that men expect to be pleasured by their (female) partners, and women are accustomed to being disappointed?
I think a lot of the difference is just ability and knowledge – Any woman who can do justice to a popsicle can give a reasonable blow job, or just be a moist cavity to fill and she’s amazing. There’s a much bigger learning curve for men. They have to find the tiny “man in the boat” that actually disappears once excited. It’s tricky! So for most one-nighters for women there isn’t enough time to do the necessary lessons in the female body. Maybe sex educators should take up this dilemma.
[...] (The post title is inspired by the one at Feminist Philosophers: Women uninterested in casual sex with those they consider likely to be dangerous and bad in bed.) [...]
What the Decision Letter Should Have Said
One nighters are just as disappointing for us guys too, we’re just wired to like them more because it’s a numerically superior way to spread our genes which is totally opposite for woman. Also just like guys, the majority of woman suck at sex, that’s not a gender issue at all. And Sage, your “Any woman who can do justice to a popsicle can give a reasonable blow job” is more wrong than you could possibly know. Out of maybe 15ish woman who’ve given me oral sex I’d say 2 were good. The rest were god-awful. I’m gonna guess men don’t fare much better, once again not a gender thing. People on average are mediocre. Whatever.
I think “likely to be dangerous” though sounding cool as a headline, is probably not the most accurate. Its probably more “whom they have no way of knowing is safe”. Because if a man walks up to a woman like this, and 20 seconds later into the conversation, a mutual good friend walks by and greets them both – the woman is very likely to all of a sudden feel very differently, and all it took was just one piece of evidence that this guy isn’t some random pervert.
Speaking of perverts, I also have another suspicion which I would test out if I could. I suspect that maybe looks are related to safety perception. In other words, the more classically handsome a man is, the more he would be assumed to be likely to be safe.and the more unattractive (physically) the more likely he’d be to not be safe.