This comes straight from Andy Borowitz:
In remarks that seemed guaranteed to create controversy, conservative radio host Rush Limbaugh said today that he was “rooting for the planet Earth to explode” because it would help the GOP retake the White House.
Mr. Limbaugh elaborated on his planet explosion theory, explaining that if the world blows up in the next four years “it will happen on Barack Obama’s watch.”
He does see that other scenarios would help the GOP:
“If the population of the U.S. was suddenly afflicted with plagues, locusts and open sores, that would be fantastic for the Republican Party,” he said. “I’m rooting for all of those things to happen.”
Limbaugh is, of course, an old fashioned Republican patriot.