The gauntlet has been thrown down. We are now officially having a Creepy Baby Gear Competition. (Except that Mr. Jender cannot play. He will win in an instant.) Please leave your entries in comments and/or send photos by way of the contact feature. (can you do that? I think you can. Someone tell me otherwise if you can’t.) For now, here is my entry. I call it the wear-your-recently-dead-baby:
Feminist Philosophers 
Can we enter stuff from the past? If so, there’s this: https://feministphilosophers.wordpress.com/2007/12/11/what-every-baby-needs-disembodied-hands/. And it’s my post, despite the thank-you to Mr Jender so surely it’s permissible.
ach! i forgot about that one. well, it does illustrate my reasons for disallowing mr jender to play! the hands will be hard to beat.
Forgot to say: AAAAAAAARRRRGHHHHH! What were they thinking?
thinking, they were not.
Not really baby stuff, but creepy when it comes to toys: my submission
I think trying to manipulate infants’ minds is the ultimate sign of creepiness…check out this baby subliminal message CD: http://www.preschoolerstuff.com/PreschoolerMusic-63958-Meditation.html
ExtendedLP, I’m dismayed (and a little flattered) that I’m not allowed to submit something for the competition. But you may very well win. I can’t decide whether that’s a dead baby or a baby gimp. Either way, it screams MISTAKE. As does the baby hammer, although, to be fair, the baby hammer would have been far worse had the hammer’s face also been the baby’s.
If I tried the subliminal CD, odds are I would have subjected Baby Jender to a stop-smoking CD. JUST TO BE SURE.
My immediate thought was that it’s a Zentai baby. How cool. And how wrong. That’s made my Monday.
hippocampa: those toys are excellent.
dalila: any product whose blurb begins with “Program your child…” is pretty freaking creepy! nice one.
mr jender: now i feel bad. go on then, do your worst. i suppose it’s not a real competition anyway, so it’s more important to see the very creepiest than to let anyone have a fighting chance.
and monkey: follow the link on ‘here’ above (which i think jender has helpfully added–thanks jender!) and it’ll lose the Zentai effect. it fits more loosely than you imagine, i think. (and the other image on the web site shows it in action with baby’s arm reaching out of it. creeeeeeepy!)
it’s not baby gear, but it is pretty darn creepy… the dora aquapet apparently was intended as a children’s toy and nobody noticed (?) that it looked just like a dildo: http://www.ubergizmo.com/15/archives/2006/11/dora_aquapet_hits_amazon.html
WOW! i mean, WOW! boingboing has a bit up about it, and it has a link to the page for this toy on amazon.com. but if you click on the link, it sends you to an amazon error page. how funny! WOW!
A late entry: http://www.abcbronze.com/pacifier.php
do you find this creepy, amy? i’m missing it. but i did a lot of bronze casting in high school, so maybe that association is distracting me away from the creepiness?
i think it’s creepy!
ah, well i’m sure it’s my sculpture background, then. all i can think is ‘yes, the plastic of the dummy would melt away nicely in the kiln; perfect for bronzing’. bronzed shoes seem creepier to me, because you’d actually have to cook the cast until the shoes are obliterated by the heat. and that makes me think of cremation. anyway, thanks for the entry amy, you have creeped jender out, at least!
Bronze your baby’s pacifier as a keepsake? DEFINITELY very creepy! Almost on a par with having your late pet stuffed and displayed in a glass cabinet.
[…] Continued here: Creepy Baby Gear Competition « Feminist Philosophers […]