For the woman who has everything

…insertable technology!

Taking the shame up a notch is the Babypod, which purports to fix the average vagina’s lack of a sound system.

Pregnant women have long been urged to play music for their fetuses to make them smarter (a premise that has little to noscientific foundation), and many companies produce prenatal speaker systems.

The makers of Babypod argue that the problem with products such as Lullabelly and Bellybuds is not that they are stupid, but that external sound doesn’t penetrate the “multiple layers of soft tissue” between the fetus and the outside world.

You can also monitor  your kegel exercises, how full your tampon is, and various other details of your menstrual cycle:

Unlike dumb diva cups, which just capture period blood, the smart diva cup analyzes your monthly effluence, using (wait for it) Bluetooth to transmit data about menstrual fluid volume and color to your phone.

Oh, the panoptical possibilities.

 

(Thanks, K!)

 

 

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