I keep seeing references to this poem

Could serendipity be a cosmic hint? In any case, Here it is:

‘This be the verse’

They fuck you up, your mum and dad.
They may not mean to, but they do.
They fill you with the faults they had
And add some extra, just for you.

But they were fucked up in their turn
By fools in old-style hats and coats,
Who half the time were soppy-stern
And half at one another’s throats.

Man hands on misery to man.
It deepens like a coastal shelf.
Get out as early as you can,
And don’t have any kids yourself.

Philip Larkin

All readers will note the use of “man”.  I think it was written in the 70’s or earlier, for what that’s worth.